Forgiveness

Recently my mom was taking a class on letting go of the past or something similar to that and she felt led to do some visiting and settling of the past to make the future more livable. What is forgiveness but letting yourself move on past the offense. Anyway, it seems that the first visit to my sister-in-law went well. I know that being apart of a family is difficult. There are ups and downs. Different personalities clashing. Similar ones wrestling for stage time. The most rewarding and yet most vulnerable people group on the planet. If we can all learn that we are on the same team, on each others side through it all, we will be much better off. All in all, I think if they will be open and honest with each other in all situations, the healing will begin and that is a beautiful thing.
The second visit to my pawpaw's house was not so good though. To save you the awful details, the short story is little communication has taken place between he and our immediate family over a 14 year period. To be fair, my mom has sent him letters, cards, etc. My brother has visited and sent pictures and letters. I have done none of the above. Several years ago, I felt that it was time to visit and if nothing else give forgiveness a try. My mom and I had decided that we would go, but when she called, he told us not to bother he would not be there and that we were dead to him. I guess I could have tried a bit harder to go, but I know that I have forgiven him. To get back to the visit, my mom said that he was asking her to leave, that she wasn't welcome there, from the moment she got there. His wife, not my grandmother who passed away in '89, has from the beginning pitted him against him own family. She and he are so caughtup in unforgiveness, they have not moved ahead in life for 14 years. All they could do was bring up the past, in detail, another sign of immovability from the past.
The two visits had different results. One hopefully will heal quickly and the other in all probably will never heal. That is what happens when we become transparent and invite others to join us in forgiveness.